You're a womanizer and a bitch.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
