I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
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She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
