i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize