there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
