god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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