WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Randomize
