we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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