giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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