I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
