What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
