you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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