I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
She has the best kind of daddy issues
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
