bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
COCAINE IS GR8
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
