He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize