Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
