Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
