i can't believe i had my finger in that
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Randomize
