Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
