I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
