come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
