He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Randomize
