He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
she looked like the before picture.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Randomize
