To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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