we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
