He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
