you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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