please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
