Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
