I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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