Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
it's great music for shaving your balls
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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