wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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