i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I have already put on my inside pants.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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