Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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