What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
