so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
