I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize