Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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