New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
My vagina just clenched in fear
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