He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Randomize
