we're blogging at a bar
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
