well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize