Please, let me fuck your mom
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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