508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
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