I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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