For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize