But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Randomize
