i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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