i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
