why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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