dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
