Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
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