.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
