the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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