i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
